Serial Killers

It’s unhealthy to discuss this or think about it. I’m disgusted at myself for even writing about it. But I am so overwhelmed right now with different feelings.

There are so many sick people out there. I wonder to myself every time I hear of some rape or murder or kidnapping, how the situation was born. Who is this killer and what are his motivations? Why do the innocent have to die? Why must the killers roam free for so long, sometimes evading capture altogether. Think about this: The Zodiac Killer, you know the one chronicled in that movie by David Fincher? He killed an estimated 35 people in 1969 and has never been caught. Then there’s Charles Manson, the deranged psychopath who orchestrated dozens of home break ins and murders. He now resides in a home for the mentally insane. He might be insane, but he’s also a great actor and has managed to fool the best of us for five decades.

Then there’s Pedro Alonso López, a man from Ecuador who killed an estimate 300 people. His sentence in his native country? 16 years. He got out in 14 due to good behavior. He was released in 1998 and he hasn’t been seen since. Nobody even knows if hes dead or alive. Most likely though, he’s on a desert island enjoying drinks and young women, all the while thinking he’s beaten God at the game of life.

There’s also Colombian born Luis Garavito. He confessed to 138 murders and got 22 years in prison for it. Because of some bizarre Colombian law that says you cant go to jail for more than 30 years, even though his sentence for the crimes came out to 1,853 years in prison, he’ll only serve 22. Should make for a nice neighbor when he gets out and moves into a new area.

So the questions is, how do these situations come about? How does God allow them to take place? If you don’t believe in God, then as Jeffrey Dahmer once said “Then what’s the point of trying to modify your behavior to keep it within acceptable ranges?” God probably allows it because we’ve done bad in this world and because he has to allow the psychopaths to exist, otherwise people will say we don’t have free will. Free will? What the hell is that anyway? What the fuck is FREE FUCKING WILL? Do you have any idea? Because I’m sure it doesn’t mean allowing some fucking dickless piece of shit to rape and kill hundreds of people and simply get off after 14 fucking years. Are you fucking kidding me? Doesn’t that kind of stuff just piss you off? And scare the hell out of you? For the killers, it didn’t scare them, it excited them. It made them ejaculate. It was like sex for them, but on a higher plain. Maybe the highest. Maybe killing is the highest of highs and so, they couldn’t refuse that feeling, that impulse.

I read somewhere that the purpose of creation and of this world is beyond human comprehension. Indeed. The murders of innocent people on a mass scale, something that has gone on for ages, is definitely beyond human comprehension.


This is funny

Wikipedia has a page entry for “List of murderers by number of victims.”



You know why religious people are always so happy?

Because they feel protected. More than others are. And it gives him confidence and it gives them a safety net and an excuse too, in a way. I wish I was that happy and confident.

Happy birthday ice cream sundae

On this day 119 years ago the first documented ice cream sundae was served. Happy 119th bday ice cream.

Late May, Early June

I remember this one night, I was standing in the backyard of my parents house. It was late. Everyone was asleep. It was my favorite time of the day, when everyone was asleep. It was like the whole world was mine. If a pin dropped, I’d be the only one to hear it. It was late may I think, or early june. It was warm but cool, if that makes any sense. There was a beautiful moon out that night but it wasn’t visible. God wanted there to be nothing but clouds that night, so we couldn’t see the moon. Its like the story of my life. I’ve spent the last 25 years trying to show my self to everyone, but I keep getting obscured by clouds. That’s the way God wants it. I wish sometimes I could talk to Him. Reason with Him. But there’s no reasoning with God. He can be a real prick sometimes.

High school

Power to the black woman who was in high school and pregnant. She still came to class even though she knew everyone would look at her and ask her questions and be assholes to her. Pretend like nothing was different. Everything was! She was 16! She was African American. She was a female. Her stupid boyfriend forgot to put a condom on. Her mother hates her. Her father beats her. The boyfriend is out with his friends drinking. Her little sister gets the wrong impression and one day get pregnant too. But this girl, she knows, she knows, she has to go to class. She has to go. There is no other school. No special place for girls like her to go to. Its public school or nothing. One day she didn’t come to class and someone told the teacher she gave birth to the baby. I wonder where she is now.


Sometimes we want something different, something someone else has. And sometimes, the person who has what we want, wants what we have.